why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
Randomize