you said youd get me home safely, you dropped me off at 9:30 last night and i just woke up on my porch.
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
You woke up in the middle of the night and told me we won the sweepstakes, the penis sweepstakes.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
I'm not sure why, but my salad smells like a Big Mac. Or maybe that's just the smell of yesterday's, seeping through my skin.
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
Randomize
