I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
Is her dick bigger than yours?
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
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