I'm just that much of a man that I can watch Ellen and Oprah back to back and still like girls.
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
Official reason: I couldn't get time off. The real reason: last Xmas nearly ended in alcohol poisoning to prevent me from screaming like a velociraptor
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
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