I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
smell my finger.
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
Randomize
