This girl I work with, who is 18 btw, invited me to her baby shower. Do they sell abortions in gift certificate form?
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
She's kind of holyer-than-thou, like god himself came down and said "please cock block your roommate at every opportunity, and if you think she's thinking of sex, tell her she's a whore"
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
I thought I was drunk because I kept grabbing his arm instead of his dick
But then I realized it wasn’t his arm and that I was very lucky
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