Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize