problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
A guy I hooked up with YEARS ago just endorsed me on LinkedIn for "customer service".
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
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