last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
Randomize
