she woke up with a sticky ear
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
fuck your aforementioned shoe
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
Randomize
