There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
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