So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
Drunk walkin through police station. America
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
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