i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
Pretty sure I just had sex with the black kid who grew up in a car from "angels in the outfield"
How come I never meet celebrities?
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
You need to stop showing people the things i drunk-text to you... i have a reputation to uphold here
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
Randomize
