is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
Girl... I just woke up with a bloody mary in a to go cup on my nightstand and two hours late for work.. I'm sorry i can't go out on weekdays anymore. Luckily my boss was just happy i was ok
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