you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
I am not drunk. I will recite the pledge.
I don't want you to recite the pledge!
Pledge alligien to america to united states of america
drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
apparently the 911 operator took drunk dialing waaayy too seriously
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
So you met him?
More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.
He sent me a snapchat of himself growing a double chin. I think we're past the stage where there's any risk of us sleeping together. Ever.
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
Randomize
