I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
NoShamevember. You game?
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
yeah i wanted to show him what i was missing, so i decided to send him a seductive picture, like the ones where the girls are eating strawberries and whipped cream. well i didn't have those, so i sent him a picture of myself naked eating a bagel
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
Randomize
