sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
It's 3 am. Nothing I've tried can get the taste of failure and vomit out of my mouth.
Randomize
