how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
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