I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
my vag sweat smells like doritos
so now that we're not dating you have to stop sending shit like this to me okay?
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
Just woke up to the cat unconscious on my stomach, his face between my tits, purring to bring down the walls. I'm endeared and horrified at the same time.
Randomize
