what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
Dear Penis Owner...our records show that you are overdue for servicing...please contact our friendly associates to schedule a thoroughly satisfying experience today...operators are standing by...
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
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