Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
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