Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
My new successful method of booty calling is sending a screencap of a map with the shortest route from their location to mine highlighted.
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
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