didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
My mother just made an innapropriate gesture with a cucumber while grocery shopping at whole foods... Then she said "bitches love cucumbers" and all this time i thought i was adopted
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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