i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
You tried to call the hospital and left a voicemail asking if you could be put on the liver transplant list as a "pre-caution"
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
He asked if I was a pirate because my "arrrrrrrrse" was worth burying. 10/10 for effort, 20/10 for serial killer vibes.
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
Randomize