So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
your brother just told me that Guinness is the first book of the Bible...
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
Randomize