Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
Emily is drunk. We're coming to see you at work and we're bringing jello shots for you.
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
Randomize