We're like a lot better than the average bears
Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
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