how hairy? two words: wookie tits
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
I made people serenade her before talking to her and went on a condom run. If I'm going to be in the friend zone, I'm going to be its fucking king.
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
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