One girl and one boy is just not enough.
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
He could only go see Deadpool without his girl if he was black-out drunk... because spoilers. They're the perfect couple.
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
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