Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
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