There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
Randomize