i upgraded from drunk texts to drunk e-mails...real world here i come
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
I have tasted many bathrooms
Randomize
