Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
