the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
This chick just walked by and pet my beard. Don't know, never talked to her. She just walked by and pet my beard.
Marry her
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
Why is the toilet broken? Why did I wake up naked in the shower, hugging a bath mat? WHY IS THE TOILET BROKEN?
Is it just clogged or something?
No! There are actual chunks of toilet on the floor.
You ever have a fart follow you around?
Randomize
