: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
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