barbara walters just said penis...
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
Randomize
