I just pynch a tree in the face
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
Please don't be alarmed by the blood on my arms and phone in the morning. It's not mine.
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
I have already put on my inside pants.
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