New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
I'm just crazy horny about you
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
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