I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
I intend to get homeless drunk
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Randomize
