brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
Seriously, don't even. "Hi, have I seen you half naked covered in bright red body paint on the internet?" is NOT acceptable water-cooler chit-chat.
Aw.
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Randomize
