I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
Randomize
