i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
Wait what do you mean I BOUGHT A FUCKING HORSE LAST NIGHT?!?!
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