Sooo... I woke up in the shower this morning. It was on.
I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
Randomize
