But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
Randomize
