Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
i just heard Winston Churchill in auto-tune. thank you nerds.
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
I have a cup of vodka in my bathroom with a straw in it. Yes, I am ready for this bikini wax.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
I'm sad that I feel like I need to temporarily change your name in my phone from Smashley until you have the baby and can be unsober with us again.
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
Randomize
