that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
Randomize
