Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
I just want to make out with him forever
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
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