if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
I was desperate so I downed my birth control with balsamic vinaigrette...
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
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