Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
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