spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize